I am in the middle of a pretty deep depression right now. Further and deeper than I have felt in recent years. Thankfully (and unthankfully), my problems' outlet has manifested in the form of anxiety rather than depression lately.. well until now.
I'm trying a new med right now (to add to the cocktail). It is for something I am not really diagnosed for, but it is yet one more attempt at relief. I tend to be really sensitive to medication side-effects. It has been several weeks and this has been a tough one. My sleep has been scattered and awful lately.
This morning was a tough, tough morning. Perhaps others can relate to this feeling I will describe, but it happens immediately when I wake up sometimes:
My eyes first open, and as my consciousness arrives, I start feeling a deep sadness and almost anger... and it is all directed at the fact that I am conscious again... able to think, able to process, able to feel.
It is Saturday... I have no responsibilities today... Why is so hard to just be awake and do nothing?